Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
