Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Randomize
