just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
kristin has been a bad kristin
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
