Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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