I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
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