I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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