ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
so much tequila, so little girl.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
