Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.