if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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