I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
