yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
There r osticjed everywhere
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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