We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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