just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology