where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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