Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
