Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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