she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
