Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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