Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
