i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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