i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
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so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
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Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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