New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
