am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
