Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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