the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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