I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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