Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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