On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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