I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
