His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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