Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize