Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize