the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
