I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Naked Twister starts at high noon
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
