I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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