if i can run in heels then i can drive
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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