I can text with my tongue
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
