hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
