Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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