As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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