Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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