I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize