I showed him my bush... on skype.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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