i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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