There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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