I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She's the barista slut.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
