wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
