Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.

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(979): View more from Texas

we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?

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These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Read it at the TFLN blog
(317): View more from Indiana

He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death

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(954): View more from Florida

Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children

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(860): View more from Connecticut

its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die

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