He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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