butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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